How My Confrontation Phase Was Like

For many nights, hundred of hours and countless torturing times... the Confrontation scenes replayed endlessly in my mind... 

 On retrospection...the Confrontation between us was a process. Like a gone bad onion, the more I peel off the layers... the more tears I shed. Yet the more teary I get, the more I wanted to get to the core of the rotten truth. 

It took huge determination and patience to get there.. And I instinctively knew that if I had neglected my gut feelings and given up earlier, the secrecy and the web of lies he spun would surely have laid waste our Marriage. He would have learnt nothing about the damage he caused, the hurt he has inflicted on me. Hence, I might as well leave the Marriage since the rotten core had remained. 

 During the final Confrontation, the facade of the "Marriage" instantaneously shattered and crumbled into a dust cloud,  engulfing us in chaos, blinding obscuring anything and everything. To survive this catastrophe, we simply had to grope our way out. 

A few days prior the Confrontation (part 1).. Or the "D" day as many betrayed spouses called it, we had countless fights; I had demanded that he come clean with his flowers and jewelry gifts which he had brought for her - Velda. However, he adamantly refused to admit he had been unfaithful and firmly insisted that I am crazy. After much deliberation, I decided to get his family involved too, since mounting family pressure on him will stress him make the process much faster.

 Fortunately, I had a reliable relationship with my father-in-law, his aunt, uncle and cousin. They knew my character and that I was never a rash or unreasonable wife. They insisted that he either gave me a reasonable explanation or confess any wrong doings before it was too late,

Nevertheless, he took the opportunity to bad mouth me to his family; he called me a crazy, unreasonable wife. He also expressed anger that I was defiling her good reputation and she had done nothing wrong. In the end, what gave him away was His uncharacteristic reaction to his family concerns and questions. This further cemented my suspicions that something more was going on and made me more determined to get to the bottom of the truth. Eventually, he was finally worn down by my endless questions and pleas for him to come clean. Confrontation (part 1) or D as many had called it, finally arrived...

 In the end, he gave the classic trickle truth answer to protect his sorry ass, to shield himself from having to deal with the extent and consequences of his selfish inhumane actions; at first he fiercely insisted that they were simply just very good friends who clicked, then he said that he had a crush on her but they never did anything beyond exchanging gifts. After which, he admitted that they had slept only once...before the final admission that they had been in a relationship for months; he was simply waiting for her to decide whether to marry her BF - Fiori (who had recently divorced his wife because of her) or him. In short, he was simply buying time to get rid of me once the divorced BF was not going to marry her.

That was just mere hours before we were to move into our new abode as I have been packing tirelessly on my own, sorting out my feelings in between bouts of crying. All the while, he was simply uninterested in the mental wreak I have become, and had retreated in our bedroom, presumably exciting telling Velda that he was a step closer to get rid of me (just like what Fiori, her divorced BF had done to his wife).

Ultimately, something snapped in me, I wanted to find out more about her, talk to her and hear from my own ears what the hell does she really want from our Marriage. Which led to Confrontation (part 2)...

 From the little bits of information pieced together from here and there, I got an irking that Velda was not genuinely interested in a relationship with him. A typical player, she is simply tired and bored of her newly divorced BF Fiori, since she has attained her goal to boost her pathetic self esteem by getting a married man choosing her over the wife. 

Velda was not even a little bit surprised when I contacted her through his hand phone. I took that as a sign that it was not her first time, and certainly not the last time. I guessed that she had been receiving confrontational calls from the wives of her married BFs a few times already.

Over the phone, she flipped the story around, lied that my spouse was the one who stalked her and that she was never an interested party. I asked her point-blank why she was messing around with a married man, she defended herself, insisted that the experience boosted her ego, especially since the attention was from someone who was older and married. Obviously, she felt she had done nothing wrong. When I asked whether she is afraid of Karma, she shrugged it off that she is not a believer. She was also confident that her BF would forgive her for cheating on him and she even sarcastically added that I must have done something to make my spouse so desperate to get rid of me. Lastly, in her own words she "never regretted destroying yet another family" and that "the husbands and wives deserved it" but nevertheless, she would definitely respect my plea to avoid my spouse.






After that call, Velda immediately went to cover up her tracks by deleting over 100+ Evernote shared exchanges that she and he had kept in their hand phones. Obviously, she was in a rush to get rid of the evidences that she had lied to me. After I relayed to my Spouse what she had told me, he was dumbfounded and heartbroken.

 A few days later, he broke down from the stress and from the realization that their love was fake. He bitterly lamented that he felt used and betrayed by her. How bloody fucking ironic, that the Betrayer crying foul to the very person he had Betrayed.

True enough after 3 days, after she came back from a tour with her BF, she initiated contact him twice, as she had wrongly assumed that I had left him like what the previous wife had done. Hence, she had mistaken thought that it was safe for her to carry out the affair again. Little did she realize that upon her second attempt, I directly reached out to her BF, and revealed how many times she had cheated on him.

Upon reflection, it was a timely move to let her BF know, since once her affair was exposed, she was too busy fixing her relationship with him. Later, I found out that she had portrayed my spouse as a predator, who preyed on young, innocent and single women like her, with fake promises that he marry them...and needless to say, her BF believed her lies. No wonder, she was so sure that her BF would definitely forgive her.